“Forgive and forget” is a very common phrase used among Nigerians, especially the religious ones. From being a little girl to being the young woman I am now, I’ve heard different opinions and explanations, but I’m yet to hear or see one who has same opinion as I, on the matter. If I have, I do not recollect.
Here’s what I think;
We have memories for different reasons, one of them being; to guide our future decisions. If we keep on forgiving and literally forgetting every sin against us, we’d never learn from our past mistakes, and will keep repeating the mistake of letting people step on our necks.
In the context used, I believe “forget” simply means “Dude, if you want to live long and have good skin and healthy hair, let go of the anger and bad energy this person’s offence caused you. Let go of the malicious feeling and be assured unlimited supply of uncontaminated oxygen.” And not “Dude, press delete and erase every memory of this person pissing in your mouth. Open your mouth again to be pissed in. Rinse and repeat.”
Imagine a life where everyone forgets the sins against them, there would be no tales to tell, and no moral lessons to learn from. The rate of ruined lives would be drastically high. No, I don’t like this picture I’m seeing.
So you know what I say? Forgive, forget to be angry, for your peace of mind (only if it matters to you. If not, you may stay angry), but do not forget the lesson(s) learnt. Once bitten, twice shy. Right? If you forgive and wipe off the memory, how would you know you’ve been once bitten?
Also, I don’t think you can say you’ve truly forgiven, without forgetting the bad energy. Personally, I can only say I’ve forgiven you when I see you or think of you, and I don’t think evil or feel anger towards you. I most likely wouldn’t remember your offence(s) immediately, without being reminded. And if I do, there’d be no malicious feeling or anger felt. Me remembering, would only keep me alert, to not give you a chance to bite me again.
Luckily, forgiveness comes very easily from me. In fact, I think I forgive way too easily, without making the offenders earn it, and sometimes, I wonder if it is a bad thing. But my good skin and healthy hair kicks me out of my doubts. If you’ve ever wondered what my skin and hair secret is; you’ve gotten a cheat, and you’re welcome.
What is your interpretation of the saying, ” forgive and forget”?
Please, let me know your thoughts. I’m eager to know.