Of all the places to receive a revelation, the toilet seat would be the last to come to mind. Well, turns out I get some of my craziest thoughts on the toilet seat and in the bathroom. Please, don’t give me that look. I’m sure there are many of us, so, rest!
On hearing ‘revelation,’ your mind probably already created a scene where I’m in some kind of trance, seeing or hearing things. Sorry, to disappoint you— though I ain’t sorry— that wasn’t what happened. I, on the contrary, was very conscious. All I did, was connect a few dots I never realized were disconnected, and that was it— a revelation.
How many times have I used the word ‘revelation’ now? You’re probably getting impatient and thinking ‘can you just spill the juice already?’ Hold on, I’m getting there. Patience is an important virtue, to survive this life (you probably didn’t know this before. So, you’re welcome).
For the longest time, I was very sure a smart mind is what first gets and keeps me attracted to a man. I realized I wasn’t entirely correct, on the toilet seat, today.
Now, I realize it’s a soulful eyes, coupled with a compassionate heart, and a bright (smart) mind that turns my cold stone heart to water.
The soulful eyes is the gravitational force that pulls me towards the lucky man. The smart mind keeps me attracted. The compassionate heart gives me more reason to stay in place, and not oppose the force of gravity, which in this case is the force of love.
I’ve been attracted to a lot of incredibly intelligent men, but not enough to cause butterflies in my belly. If I hadn’t experienced that head-over-heels feeling when I was 18, I would have concluded I am incapable of having butterflies. That experience has helped me set a standard for myself, though sometimes, I feel like I may never feel that with another again— scarcity of soulful eyed men, you know.
This man who gave me so many colourful butterflies in my belly, didn’t even have to try. All he had to do was; have soulful eyes, be intelligent, and be compassionate. That was all, and he had a girl’s heart rolling out of her mouth.
It took me over a year to realize it wasn’t just my shy nature that made me want to hide (I used to be really shy. I’ve just found ways to put it in check), every time I saw him; it was his piercing eyes. I feared they’d see through me, and unveil my secrets and thoughts I didn’t want to share.
It took me more than a year, and talking to my best friend, to realize that alien feeling wasn’t just a crush, like the other 999 ones I had. And I asked myself, ‘how did I get here?’ cos we didn’t even have that kind of relationship. We never talked about things like that. In case you’re wondering, I killed all the butterflies, as soon as I realized they were butterflies— it wasn’t to be. I thought it to be an inappropriate feeling, at that time.
Years later, I met another man, at a place where I trained for a few months, and history almost repeated itself. If you are wondering if this man too, has soulful eyes, he does. Just like with the first man, he didn’t even try. With no inappropriate conversation or action; just him being kind to me and others, and looking right into my soul with those eyes of his, I missed a step. I almost tripped.
You know what kept me from tripping? He’s a married man. Doesn’t God just work in mysterious ways? He saved me from butterflies!
I called the fire department to come extinguish the tiny spark, as soon as I got to know there was a Mrs. A drop of water could have done the job, but I wasn’t going to take chances, just had to call the fire department to do their thing.
Did you notice I didn’t add that he has a smart mind? Could it mean that intelligence isn’t the most important thing to me? Or maybe that was just an exception. I didn’t get to have lots of conversations with him, but he sure is a very sensible man. He listened, and was open minded. I won’t be surprised to find out he’s a very intelligent one.
I wish I could elaborate on how the eyes of these men affected me, just so it makes sense to you. There’s nothing extraordinary about their eye colour or shape, it’s just the depth those eyes carry. I could stare and just drown in them, and feel understood, without uttering a word. I think the thing about people with soulful eyes is that they are by default, kind people.
It’s funny how the similarities between these men didn’t end at just soulful eyes and kind hearts. They are both sinfully handsome; have beautiful voices that can make you confess things you didn’t do; have smiles that make you wonder what the face of God looks like; both men are tall; and they both have the ability to make me feel very special and vulnerable— must be how they looked at me with those piercing eyes, which I believe is the same way they looked at others. Eyes that made me wish I had big dark sunshades worn over my eyes, to deny them access to my soul.
So! I guess it’s safe to say, I cannot be totally trusted around men with soulful eyes, cos I may trip, and break a hip.
I guess it’s also safe to say, I know exactly what to settle for, now. This, dear patient reader, was the revelation. Just have soulful eyes, a heart full of compassion, and a smart head on your neck, I might just propose to you with a bunch of wild flowers, and a diamond ring. Oops! I forgot to mention, they both had good personal hygiene practices. That too, is very important.
Now that I’ve shared with you, my big revelation, do you think I’m out of my mind? Do you share with me, the belief that the eyes are doors to one’s soul?
Do not hesitate to drop your comment, and let me know what you think.